I N T R O D U C T I O N   p a g e   3

Why, you may wonder, does it take so long for heirs to grow up? This question haunts many wealthy parents, especially if they too are heirs. Does a substantial inheritance delay maturity? Based on our interviews, it seems that young adults who are given large inheritances in their teens or at twenty-one are in fact at greater risk of making a slow start on the path to adulthood than their peers who have to support themselves.

That is the bad news.

The good news is that it doesn't have to be that way. Wealthy parents can indeed raise healthy children. If you want your children to flourish and become productive adults, you need to commit to two major responsibilities. First, give your children what all children need. You must be willing to give them plenty of love, spend plenty of time with them, foster their self-esteem, set clear limits and have realistic expectations. Find out what each child's unique qualities and take the time to nurture them. Second, you need to actually model — not just preach — your values.

From our experience and the experience of others, we have come to believe that certain core values are essential in order to successfully pass on wealth. These values include coming to terms with your own issues around money; being a good example; speaking honestly about money; nurturing your children's confidence and self-esteem; teaching them that they can stand on their own; modeling and teaching the value of work; encouraging generosity; helping them understand that "we" aren't better than "they" are; teaching them that responsibility goes hand in hand with privilege; and helping them accept that wealth is a blessing, not an automatic entitlement.

Though there are hundreds of parenting books available, some of them very good, at the back of this booklet we have provided you with a Resource Directory that includes two books written specifically for affluent parents.